Clicking in #03 - Your Internal Quality, and the "3 People Scale"

Assalamualaikum w.b.t. and Greetings.

Thank you for still joining in this series, where we unwrap the most unspoken quality and rule when we are working. Fresh graduates are endorsed with great results and core knowledge, but none are ever prepared when it comes to the real life work challenge.

In the last newsletter, we have looked into some tools to help you quickly click in with your new work environment. Most of it are pure grit and endurance to ensure you understand the whole business understanding.

But truth be told, that is not sufficient enough. No matter how clever you are, you need to right mental strength to persist and see through the work framework.

At the end of this newsletter, I will give some mental framework, a simple one, you can instantly make use of to overcome any hurdles.

Let’s dive in.

1. Action is Louder Than Words

In my early career days, I am excited to see my senior deployed our application through productions. With each clicks and keyboards clacking, it was mesmerizing, even more so when the whole company can then see the result of it!

Their actions was clear, and the results are even more so.

As I progress in my career, I learned that words holds little value. You can wiggle your way through your sweet talkings, but the moment you are unable to take actions from it, you lose.

This, is a strong statement. Why?

For you to perform an action, you need the right knowledge, skill and more manifest what you said. Sweet talkers are beneficial for the short game. We? We want to focus on the long game, as working is not just for the company. It is a life-long skills that you will take with you, to your deathbed.

With this, what I am trying to emphasize is that, when you struggle with something, do not ever let your mouth run faster than your actions.

One example I can give is the recent project that I led.

There is this one quote, I noticed from our Principal Engineer in the company. He puts it as his MS Teams status. It goes something like.

“Do not mistake motion, with action”

Being loud, moving around, fidgeting and clacking your keyboard, are just noises. Until you are able to deliver your action, then only those noise became your evidence.

2. Prepare to Ram Through

Our Prophet Muhammad pbuh, is a great example, the best of a man could be in this world.

It will be a mistake to look at his value only religiously. His impact goes beyond that, and we can be sure to learn from it.

When it comes to preaching, we all know how our beloved Prophet struggles with his preaching. Thrown stones at, mocked, his friend tortured and more. He lost his loved ones, one by one, again and again.

Yet he persevere.

And the results? 1400+ years after and his teachings and guidance spread throughout the world. What better example I can give, than him.

In our works, we are sure to be faced with challenges. But remember how our prophet smiles through, and stay resilient throughout the phase. As much as important actions are, your mental state needs to be leveled up too.

Without it, your actions will fade away as you lose hope.

Countless of times I felt like giving up. There are instances where I wrote my resignation letter. The only thing between me and resigning is just a button away. But then I looked at my loved ones, and told them I am strong for them.

3. The 3 People Scale

I was going through mentally what I faced the last few months. Both works and life experiences.

Not only do I want to do my best in my work, but I want to improve myself from those around me. Learning from our prophet is the best way, i.e. how he treats his family, friends and followers.

With our daily challenges, I like to think of myself sitting inside a scale.

This is something I made up mentally, and perhaps you can learn from it too.

On the left side of the scale, there is me, doing whatever it was that I was pondering.

On the right side? A group of a very positive persons. 3 of them, in that right hand of the scale. They are the best in shape of a human, healthy, smart, young and all that you can think of. They are your mental consultants.

For example, if I was in a middle of discussion and was about to get frustrated in that conversation, I brought up this 3 People Scale mentally.

I am on the left, the best 3 peoples on the right.

Would the 3 people be angry in the conversation? I don’t think so, they’re the best. I would imagine they would smile through, and forgive. They would be patience throughout the whole conversation, and think rationally, not emotionally.

Another instance is, when I am talking with my family member and they need help in something.

I would imagine the 3 people scale.

What would this 3 best people do to their family, in my situation. Would they help them? Would they just sit by and watch their family member, and and not help at all?

No! They would rush to help their family members.

This 3 People Scale is a great way to zoom out. And not only you are zooming out, you are putting the pressure of your chest and should, and put those onto the 3 people instead. This mindset helped me see what others would do in a given challenge.

For you, I would suggest you to try this “3 People Scale” when you are in a pinch or challenge. The goal is never to solve a problem on the spot, but more on how we would approach and react to such situation.

Our reaction is more important than our actions, as that is what people will remember until they die.

Someone could give me RM 1 million but when they spit on my face in doing so, I would then hesitate to accept it.

I am sure there are instances you faced in your own life, where someone’s emotion and reaction are just so bizare. Some are great, some are bad. In both cases, we remember them.

Just remember. A scale, you on the left, 3 best people on the right.

Imagine yourself facing and looking at those 3 best people.

“What would they do in this situation?”

And balance those scale based on your answer and judgement.

4. Finally, Be Your Best Self

In my early career, I would think of my career as something that is one sided. Only one side, that is the company, that is winning. No matter how much I did, I’m just a cog in the wheel.

I would just stay quiet in the office, and let others play the ‘office politic’, and grow their career more and more. I would be content with what I have, return home

But as I grow and mature, those aren’t necessarily true.

Sure, we spent our time and energy to help realise someone else’s vision and mission. But during the journey, you would grow so much and mature. There are no other way you can avoid this.

And, with this new perspective, no matter which company that I joined, I am 100% sure, in the end, I would love myself for what I did and achieved. I will one day look back and be proud of myself, for I think about my own success and strengh as well.

Do it for the one you loved.

Wrapping Things Up

There are more I would like to write in this series.

As much as important actions are, our mental health is equally important as well. It would be pointless to be the richest man on earth, while losing everything in between. Your family, your wife, your children, just to be in that number 1 spot.

Our prophet pbuh earned the number one spot, all while giving his best to everyone around him, even those that are not muslims. He had a great mental attitude, so much that we can learn from.

As always, I will see you again inshaAllah in the next newsletter. May Allah s.w.t. blesses each of you, and grant you ease in every struggle you are facing right now. Only He knows that you are strong, in facing this life’s hurdle.